On The Eve Of My Birthday: Turning 25

Turning 25

 

Turning 25.

It’s a scary number, isn’t it? You are in your mid-twenties, in the middle of a quarter life crisis and it also means that you have successfully completed a quarter century! Even from society, if you are turning 25, you are under a lot of pressure to have your shit together.

I remember when I was younger, around 16, when I had just stepped into college. I was fresh with excitement, with a 1000 dreams in my eyes and hope in my heart. I had cleared my board exams with distinction. And if I was smart enough to get distinction, I would obviously be successful, right? My friends called me pretty, so naturally I would find a wonderful guy, right? Sounds so rosy and beautiful, but life is a far cry from that.

I wish I could go back to being that young girl, at least for a moment. Just to understand what made her so positive. Innocence, probably.

‘’At 25, I will be the star of my company, earning truck loads of money. I would have lost my baby fat by then and I will look beautiful as I marry the love of my life’’ I used to tell my best friend. At that point, 25 seemed so far away. 25 seemed like an age where I would be a mature woman who had her life sorted. I thought I would have it all at 25.

Tomorrow is my birthday and I smirk and shake my head as I remember the dreams of that young me. I am nowhere close to where I thought I would be.

I do have two degrees to my credit but that wasn’t a breeze.

I have one and a half years of work experience but I was neither the star nor did I earn tons of money.

I was diagnosed with PCO last year which gave way to massive weight gain and acne all over my face.

I was supposed to get married last December to a guy of my choice but I decided to call it off.

So, on the eve of my 25th birthday, I haven’t really gotten where I thought I would. My 16 year old self would have been extremely disappointed and disheartened but my 25 year old self is  super proud of herself. I am not perfect, but who cares? I am me, my own damn self and I wouldn’t wanna be anyone else.

 

After so many trials and tribulations, I have finally realized that there is never going to be a phase of life where I am going to ‘’have it all’’. And that’s okay.

I ain’t hurting that my vision of a Terrific Twenty-Five didn’t happen. I feel happy and blessed. And today, I want to count my blessings:

  •  I am happy for my parents, who are the two people I love unconditionally
  • I am happy for my family and friends who accept me and love me for who I am
  • I am happy that I am a smart girl who had the brains to get out of an abusive relationship
  • I am happy that each day, I grow stronger and work a little harder.
  • I am happy to be in a stage of life where I can accept my body for what it is and respect it
  • I am happy that I don’t let some numbers or a boss’s approval decide my worth
  • I am happy to be pursuing my big-ass dream of being a blogger
  • I am happy to be the kind of person I am.

Yes, I am turning 25 and I do admit, that I am a teeny-weeny bit scared of the surprises that life has in store for me. But I am also excited to see what adventures I will go on, what laurels I will garner, what memories I will make.

You know what’s the best part?

I know myself. So I know that no matter what life throws at me, I will be fine.

 

As for my birthday tomorrow, I am going to wear a sexy dress, killer heels, bright lipstick and I am going to paint the town red. I am going to raise a toast to myself.

I am going to celebrate me, for being the amazing and one-of-a-kind person that I am.

I am going to celebrate 25 years of being fabulous!

-Until I turn 30!

 

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